Monday, February 27, 2012


our house has a fun little addition on the back that i call the "den" and evan calls the "sunken family room." when i say "the den," evan gives me a quizzical look, and so whenever he says the "sunken family room" you better believe i'm going to start having no idea what he's talking about.

BUT. this room is an addition with a fireplace and pretty french doors that i kind of want to take down (the doors are to our dining room...not the outside. that'd be crazy. MY HOUSE HAS NO DOORS, PLEASE COME STEAL OUR JUNK.) ANYWAY. but it's HUGE. huge, huge huge. it had this UGLYASS fireplace (really, the only way you can describe it) and the previous owner had painted the room grey and white and put wood trim around the entire room IN THE MIDDLE OF THE WALL. it was all boring 1990's up in thurr. we had to paint the room because we had to paint the entire house because she smoked in it. tell me, why did the girl who is allergic to half the world and most especially cigarette smoke buy the house from a smoker? does not compute. (no more smoke, i'm a master cleaner.) and we could not find a paint color that we LOVED and finally decided on that sage-y green. it clashes with every other color in my house. it clashes with our design aesthetic because it is boring as all get out. AND? i HATEDESPISELOATHE entirely the ugly two color thing it's got going on. it is the most random, uncoordinated, uglyass room. and it is getting a freaking makeover. HA LE FREAKIN LU JAH.

so out of no where, it has become our first project. (you guys? i have a PINK, MAROON and FOREST GREEN BATHROOM. how does the den override my 1975 bathroom? it is horrible. save me.)

it started when i walked down there, saw this uglyass fireplace and turned around and left. it made me angry. hahaha i'm a bit overdramatic.

it just wasn't us and i couldn't find anything in my stash of random decorations to match it. everything clashed and everything looked wrong.

so we painted it.

 evan's dad primed it with his handy-dandy sprayer (because he is a legit painter) and i sat on our little room heater and bossed them around (because i am legit bossy).

 he made me put plastic on everything and it super stressed me out. (and you can see that horrid wood trim that evan went batshitcrazy on this weekend and ripped down. now we have an uglyass white strip around our room. MUCH BETTER. HA.) but it stressed me out because if you are getting paint on my brand new couches that are like 10 feet away from this spray business....then, don't. but he didn't. and instead evan wrapped the paint can lid in the plastic and then dropped it---PAINT SIDE DOWN---onto the brand new carpet. so that was fun.

 i personally really like the look of the paper.

OH AND UM I PUT GLITTER IN THE PAINT. ahaoigneoinfoasngd. i saw this here, but on her IG feed first and so i really had no idea what i was doing. so i just added like half a can of glitter i found in my closet and on it went. i was worried that the paint would coat each piece of glitter and make it lumpy, but it didn't. and when i couldn't really see the glitter in my lil bucket, i just added some more. i had to wait until evan's back was turned because he was totally not on board with this. i kind of didn't really care and i'm kind of in love with it. it's the perfect amount of glittery, and it's not lumpy. after reading carly's post about how much glitter she used i almost went back over it again with another coat, but i'm trying really hard to not. i am the worst at knowing when to stop.
 it is very impossible to take a picture of glitter. of glitter that is like only kind of there, in certain lights....but believe you me. if you look reaaaaaal close on the top left hand side, you can see two tiny little glitter dots! it's super subtle and TELL ME. how many people have a glitter fireplace? exactly.

i'm in an everloving battle with my mantle decorations. the frame is from evan's parents and was a wedding gift along with a super sweet note about our relationship. i replaced it with this monogram print i found on danielle's blog (here) and the note is going in our wedding album (i'm telling you, it's the nicest thing, ever). the bird is from TJ MAXX, the flowers from world market and the vase from hell (i mean hob lob). it's embarrassingly naked...but it is 92849873 times better than it was before.

next up are the walls, pillow cases, curtains and some pretty art. also, hiding the cords to the TV because evan doesn't understand how seeing all those cords hang down our walls gives me a nervous twitch. i also really need to get sucked back into pinterest so i can find some fun decorating ideas for this brand new room.

Wednesday, February 22, 2012

3 randoms.

1. a little game we play at work: pass the sick.

here's how you play: acquire a sick that requires you to cough NO LESS than 35 times a minute. and it has to be the sickest kind of cough you can muster. the kind where you cough all the air out of your lungs; don't cough those little wussy baby coughs like something went down the wrong tube. make it count. if you have a nice, wet cough, even better.
walk around coughing your eyes out of your head and don't cover your mouth. don't wash your hands. don't lysol anything. (one time, HR sent out an email reminding people to wash their hands after going potty. in case you are confused i don't work in a daycare. that was real life.) keep coughing until your lungs are bruised and inflamed and your esophagus is as dry as a rock. one point for every person who gets your sick!

i'm not even kidding. this is a for reals game we play. this hacking cough has gone from one end of the office to the other, climbed the stairs to the 5th floor and came back down. it jumped over me and then it came back and missed me again. i swear if i get this, i will personally hold these people down and spray lysol up their noses until their lungs are clean of this vile disease.

2. hair.

 i'm having an on again off again love affair with my hair. this is the longest it has ever been and i can't decide if i want to keep it or donate it. to the trash can. i want to keep it long because i want so badly to be good at doing my hair. but let's be real. i'm just not. i'm really good at getting it stuck in everything, and evan's really good at laying on it and ripping it out of my just don't know.  and short hair. how short? like pixie? shoulder length? chin length? a-line? asymmetrical? TOO MANY OPTIONS. can we pause for a moment and think about how obnoxious it is to grow out your hair?! omg. suck. and? i have this stupid little hair flip cow lick thing in the back that WILL. NOT. STOP. unless my hair is this long.

then and now. long verse short. 21 verse 23. 

i don't know what to do. if my hair would just behave on a regular basis, i wouldn't have to threaten to cut it off. and would my new bangs look good with a bob? oh mah gosh. FIRST WORLD PROBLEMS.


3.  something that makes me want to push you.

when i have really exciting news and you give me your two cents that is basically bashing my really exciting news and if you are a member of my family and you are not being nice and or kind and or supportive, then shut your hole. i hate nothing more than bossy people. especially those bossy people who have no idea why you do the things you do because it is their way or it's wrong and there is no convincing them otherwise. because obviously, someone who is 19 and in their first year of college knows a hell of a lot more than i do about my own life. obviouslyyyy.

Thursday, February 16, 2012

valentines days

 yes, DAYS, plural. we had three to be exact. we didn't want to celebrate on the actual day because obviously EVERYONE does that and i don't do well in crowded places. so we decided that monday, febuary 13, would be our valentines day this year. i had purchased thee. cutest. dress from modcloth (see below). for monday. which i actually wore on sunday when i convinced evan that sunday sounded like a better valentines day than monday.

you guys? i love this dress. it's lace, it's beautiful, it is completely different from everything i own. but it is SEE-THROUGH and it is SHORT. i mean like, sorry to the entire restaurant for the free peek at what i've got going onSHORT. it's okay, though. because it's also a little small. so when it like actually fits (like after i stop eating 3,000 calories in 1 meal for the sake of valentines day?) i think it will fit better. and excuse that crappy picture...ahemEVANahem....couldn't figure out the camera. PLUSIWASSTARVING! doesn't that look so delish? i crave sushi every day because of this restaurant. damn them and their shrimp tempura.

please note the 3,000 calorie dessertS, again with the plural, we partook in. banana tempura and cheese cake tempura. except the bananas they served with honey and i despise honey so i mostly shoved the cheesecake in my mouth and watched the grammys. i'm sexy and i know it.

remember how i said i thought sunday was better for valentines day? well, monday was a good day, too. because evan wanted to cook valentines dinner. (he cooks!) i came home to him breading little baby shrimp and marinating the most gigantic steaks i'd ever seen. AND IT WAS SO GOOD.

the food barely made it to the table before i was inhaling it...but i did take a picture of dessert. chocolate. molten. lava. cake. and fresh raspberries. omg. (it's hilarious that i talk about how fast i eat because i could possibly be the slowest eater on the planet.) these were so good. we get them all the time, but obviously everything tastes better on valentine's day.

evan got me conversation hearts (only because i threw a fit about not finding them at the frickin candy store!) because out of all the holidays they are my favorite candy. except for the yellow. why does the world insist on making banana flavored things taste so disgusting? i don't know if you've ever had a real banana, but it doesn't taste like that.

he also sent me a huge bouquet of roses to my work which came in a HUGE box wrapped in like 50 layers of plastic and tape and obviously all sorts of other loud materials that seriously brought so many people to my desk to see what was making that awful noise. oh, nothing...just me and mah flowers. they didn't come with a vase but i was worried they wouldn't make it to 5 without water so i used my giganto tea cup. LUCKILY i have two tea cups at work so i was still able to get my daily intake of 500 cups of tea, don't worry.

and on real valentines day we weren't going to do anything since evan had a basketball game that evening but i had something super exciting to tell him (no, no babies) and so i made him take me to dinner so i could squeal in the middle of the restaurant over shrimp tacos with lime sauce (OMG.) and cider beer and so our awkward server could think that we had totally escaped from the looney bin. (and we had fried ice cream. i see a bad pattern developing here.......damn you fried food.)

i totally used to be a valentines day hater. i guess that's what happens when all you date are psychos who freak their freaks on you for not sending them a crush soda? but then when evan and i had our first valentines day he was the sweetest human ever who gave me a rhubarb tart from the cutest little bakery (poets is its name. how cute is that?!)  and ever since then i've kind of loved it. most especially when he celebrates our love for three days in a row, gives me crazy good back massages and sings me to sleep. 

i mean really.

Tuesday, February 14, 2012

this is us.

 taken from here.

1. tell us about you & your husband.

this is my blog so you already know me.
evan is my husband. the love of my life. we have some really exciting opportunities coming up this spring and i am currently soaking up every second of together time, since we will be seeing much less of each other come may. he loves africa and orphans and our two puppies and anything sports. he is very tall and he always tells me i am beautiful. he is a keeper.

2. how did you meet? tell us about your first date.

we met through my then-boyfriend who took me putt-putt golfing with a bunch of his friends. i drug along my two best friends because i didn't like to speak to people i didn't know and i needed comfort people. evan was there and he was SO annoying. being such a boy and being so loud. i ignored him the entire time and refused to even look in his general direction. a few weeks later then-boyfriend made me go to evan's house (again, brought along the besty) and watch a movie (saw) and we finally spoke. we found out we'd been going to the same church since forever, and we hung around the same group of people. and had never met. i decided he was an ok individual and he took this to mean that he should crash EVERY. SINGLE. DATE. my then-boyfriend and i had. i am not even kidding. he would not give up.

eventually then-boyfriend and i broke up and i was broken hearted and "ready to give up on love" (ohhhh 17-year-old larissa. you were so cute and naive) when evan swooped in. our first date was probably......watching dick and jane. or when he asked me to go make out with him. i'm telling you, he's a smooth criminal.

3. what was your opinion of relationships, love and marriage before meeting your husband?

i always wanted to get married and i always wanted him to be the sweetest, kindest, most loving human on this planet. i wanted him to have super curly hair (see above photo, he has since chopped it off), and i wanted him to look kind of ridiculous in a tux so that we could be super casual on our wedding day. i wanted him to be a singer and i wanted him to love my Lord and love to worship as much as i do. i know that if i would have made a check list of the things my husband HAD to be, evan would have checked off each and every box. every cheesy little thing, every huge, most important thing. check, check and check.

4. at what point in your relationship did you know you were in love?

i am a year older than evan so i was starting my freshman year of collage as he finished his senior year of high school. i had planned on going to a school two hours away and changed my mind literally 24 hours before orientation that summer. i was in denver at my cousin's wedding, sitting by the pool, chatting with him on instant messenger (oh, the glory days of AIM & MSN) and he was telling me he would love me no matter which school i chose (2 hours away school or school in town) and that he could see himself spending the rest of his life with me. at 17. i think my heart skipped a beat or maybe even stopped right then and there.

5. tell us about your engagement. (was elaborate, simple or have a special meaning?)

we had been talking about getting engaged for a while. we'd swoon over rings, fall in love all over again and continue dating. he bought my ring after i'd found "the one" and kept making excuses as to why he hadn't bought the ring. the night he bought my ring i was working as a server in a restaurant and he sat in my section and stared at me for a good 15 before my boss made him leave. he was acting super strange but i didn't think anything of it.

the night he asked my parents' permission i was babysitting. we had been texting back and forth and i said, "what are you doing? asking my parents' permission?" AS A JOKE. and guess what? he was! (PSYCHIC.) he told me later he thought that i had driven by and seen his car and freaked his freak a little bit.

weeks later he asked me to go on a walk with him to a little park we frequented that had the most gorgeous view of our city. i had to work that night and i wanted to say no, but i had been wanting to go forever, so i agreed. we walked to the edge and i told him i had to leave soon to get ready for work. we stood there for a while just being quiet and being together when he started to pull something out of his pocket. i totally acted like i didn't see it, mostly because i didn't want to be disappointed if it wasn't a ring.

it wasn't.

it was a ring pop. you have to know something about me: i hate suckers. hard candy. ring pops. but. when evan asked me to be his girlfriend (in that exact same spot) he gave me a ring pop. so he said something about how he wanted to marry me, and even though he couldn't buy my ring right now, he would and this was just a little promise of his love for me.

i was like, great, thanksbye, when he said, "why don't you open it? it's a new flavor." (for the record: it was cotton candy. sick.) i didn't want to be rude so i tried to open it and couldn't (i can't open anything. ever.) so he took it from me and ripped it open and i saw this little blue ribbon. i thought i had won something! (RING POPS 4 LYFE!) when all of the sudden he's down on one knee professing his love and asking me those four beautiful words. i didn't believe him (who would after that dirty trick?!) and he had a pretty rough time convincing me.

6. tell us about your wedding!

it was perfect. my best friend helped plan the entire thing with me, and my mom was my voice of reason and my DID YOU BUY YOUR CANDY FOR YOUR CANDY TABLE YET energizer bunny reminder. our venue was absolutely perfect and gorgeous. it accommodated our 500, yes FIVE HUNDRED guests. INSANE. it rained.  my bridesmaids were the most beautiful best friends i could ask for. evan DID not wear a tux, he wore a suit. my flower girl was the cutest flower girl you've ever seen. she stood up with us the entire time and did not smile once.  we danced and partied all night. we felt so much love from all our family and friends, it makes me teary-eyed to think about how much love they showered us with. we took communion as a married couple and flies mated on our bread. gross. our friend michael sang "beautiful" by shawn mcdonald and i told evan to "shut up" mid prayer (he was praying over us) so i could listen to our song. michael and his sister also played the cello and violin as our in and out songs. most beautiful music i've ever heard.

7. what song did you dance to for your first dance?

then by brad paisley. i love country, what can i say?

8. do you have any goals as a married couple?

about a million, approximately. we want to adopt. we want to travel the world. we want to be a role model for our friends and their relationships.

but for me? my goal is to never utter an angry word about evan to anyone. it is so easy to get caught up in gossip and it can so easily turn ugly. i have made it my priority to not speak ill of him. especially to my family, to his family, to our friends and in the future, to our children. i once heard someone say, "i never heard my mom say anything bad about my dad." and i thought that was the sweetest testament of love. and i promised myself, evan and those future bebe's that that would be me.

9. any advice for newly engaged or newly wed couples?

don't ever stop dating. just because you're married, or almost married doesn't mean your love ends. don't let it grow stale. make time for each other and include each other in your lives. do sweet, unexpected things for each other CONSTANTLY. forgive and allow yourself to be forgiven.

10. has your opinion of love changed since your relationship started?

very much. this isn't just some high school relationship. this is for keeps. we always treated our relationship like it was destined for marriage; not because we're some high and mighty couple expecting love to fall into our laps, but because we wanted it to last. i know that the love we have is completely different than the relationships i had with my high school boyfriends. i know that treating a relationship like it's end result is marriage will get your far more with your significant other, than just having fun because you're lonely.

11. where do you see yourselves in 10 years individually and as a married couple?
as a couple: we'll have lots of bebe's (our own + adopted. LOTS.).  we'll be 100 times more in love and we'll look back on today, when i didn't think i could love him any more and we'll laugh. i have no goals for my professional life or our location. we'll be where He wants us to be.

individually: mama. wife. lover. friend.


Play H-O-R-S-E.

I hate playing basketball. So take one guess at who put this in the date jar.

Me. Baahahahahaha

I'm tricky. I hate playing basketball but I loved playing horse when I was a child. We have a park right across the street and a basketball hoop right in that park. Perfect.

My parents used to take me kicking and screaming to basketball camp where I refused to learn anything or even try. Thus, basketball has become a sort of mix between ice skating and volleyball because THOSE are the things I'm good at. My hands in perfect AND beautiful formation? Ice skating. My lay-up? Volleyball approach. Perfectly pointed toes mid jump? Ice skating. Mostly, it's Evan laughing at me and me making a ridiculous fool out of myself and losing two horse games in a row. (yes, even when I had horse and Evan had pig. That was the game I did not make a single shot.)

But it was fun. And relationship building. For me to step out of my comfort zone (and that wasn't so much of a step as it was a LEAP) and to do something my husband loves to do. And not care too much about how my arms don't exactly go up as much as they go straight out. I never did get why my shots were air balls........

And it was fun. But only because Evan NEVER laughed at me. Only encouraged me and taught me how to flick my wrist for the perfect spin.

It was fun. I kinda think it might become our thing.

Friday, February 10, 2012

eleven questions

sweet danielle did this fun fun fun post and i want to play along because if you need to one know thing about it, it's that i love to talk about myself. kidding, but srsly.

rules: first, post 11 things about you. then answer the 11 questions from the previous poster (danielle). then create 11 new questions. then tag people (which, no thanks, tag yourselves).

eleven things about moi:

1. my worst habit: since i have *great* bangs (ha. hahaha.) to get ready i always re-wet them so they'll do what i say. i wet a comb and move my bangs around. but, if i get long hair that isn't bang? i'm too lazy to move it where it's supposed to go. especially when it's like under a layer of bang. YOU TELL ME how the heck a piece of long hair gets underneath all the short ones? my hair has magic. anywaaaay, i am too lazy to make it go where it's supposed to go when clearly it wants to be a bang. so i cut it. pretty soon, the entire middle section of my hair is going to be classified as "bang" and the rest will be long. it's some sort of reverse mullet.

2. i have a problem with noise. if you're making a noise, and i can hear it, that's the problem. any noise at all. coughing, burping (omg, don't even get me started on how gross burping is. ew.), blowing your nose (also disgusting, please go in the bathroom and WASH YOUR HANDS afterwards.), opening and shutting your car doors 500 times, honking your car horn, revving your engine, your music, etc. i need silence. i have a problem, and i realize this.

3. i have a pretend accent that will someday be real because i can't stop.

4. when i was a very small child, i put my hands directly on a burning fireplace. i also walked backwards with my eyes closed all the way around the block with my bff christopher and when i got home, he was no longer with me and my arm had a huge gash in it and was bleeding everywhere. i needed constant, hands-on supervision. (and by needed, i mean need. present tense.)

5. you know who i love? ellen degeneres. when she pretend has a sloth on her show for kristen bell? cried. when she phone called that crazy texas lady? cried. i would probably get cable just for her show.

6. it's really a miracle i have any teeth. i grind my teeth so hard at night. i clench my jaw during the day. when i was a kid i'd eat handfuls of raw pasta. and handfuls of grain. well, i don't really know what it was, but it was hard. like tiny little rocks that my mom would turn into buns at thanksgiving. probably grain. okay. i eat ice like i've never had a drink of water in my whole life. i've only ever chipped a tooth once and it was a tiny little chip the dentist rolled his eyes at me when i asked him to fix it. i have teeth of steel.

7. i hate cinnamon.

8. also as a child i learned to do this thing with my eyeball where i'd squeeze it (lids down, obviously) and it'd make this little popping noise. it doesn't hurt at all, and you can't even feel it, really, but i used to do that ALL THE TIME. then i dated this kid in high school and we'd sit up all night talking to each other on the phone and one time i straight up asked him, "can you pop your eye?" i have issues. he did not break up with me after i asked him that, so maybe he has more issues.

9. whenever someone i know gets engaged, i always have this little pang of jealousy shoot through my stomach. i want to get married again. to evan, obviously.

10. according to project runway, i'm the least fashionable person in the whole world. (did anyone see last night's episode? are YOU KIDDING ME!? they kept the "coming to america" outfit over that hilarious man who did not get his design from a three year old? sick. that "coming to america" outfit was so bad. and that one chick was like "i love the top with the neck thing." [exact quote] i slapped her.)

11. when i was little my favorite favorite favorite show was diagnosis murder. oh my gosh. love. dick van dyke is the best. but mostly, i wanted to be a pathologist. other favorite shows in my life time? bones. csi. etc. bodies, death, blood, mysteries. so interesting. (did you know forensic pathology is a 13-year degree? um...holy hell.)

danielle's questions:

1. what is your biggest fear?
if i were to put all my fears on a scale of 1 to 10 of how much anxiety each of them gives me, oh boy. we're talking like stage 11 here, people.
spiders? do i have to look at it? 8-9. do i have to touch it? 25. is evan home to kill it? (yes) 5; (no) 50. did i just kill it and i can't find it's body? 5147895714852348. is it hairy? 16897427980289574915823275879687201.
flying in a plane? 11. over the ocean? 15. when the plane drops out of the sky in an air pocket? 100.
driving in the snow? 11.
public speaking? 11.
evan being hurt because he doesn't text me back for minutes hours? 50. MILLION.

2. when was the first time you fell in love? puppy love counts.
i have a different view of what love is now that i'm all married and mature and junk. i was one of those girls who really, really, really liked all of her boyfriends. maybe, possibly classify me as like a stage 5 clinger. i hearted this boy so hard when i was in kindergarten i kissed him under the slide. and then again in 1st grade i said, "can i tell you a secret?" and then i kissed him. ON HIS EAR. omg. i am so embarrassed by my former self. that obviously wasn't loveeeee, but it was probably pretty close.

3. if you were turned into an action figure, what two objects would your doll come with?
oh gosh. a tube of hot pink lipstick and an iphone.

4. if you knew today was your last day on earth, what would you do?
i cannot even handle this question. thinking about myself dying stresses me out. (11. haha. not funny.) let's pretend it's my last day because i'm moving to the moon. okay. i'd have my favorite smoothie (raspberries, raspberry sorbet and lemons. ohmygaaa.) i'd have like 40. ok, i cannot answer this question. bahahaha

5. what is your favorite word?
hmmm....i don't like picking favorites and hurting the rest of all the words' feelings.

6. what is the first thing you do when you wake up in the morning?
potty break.

7. what is the craziest thing you've ever done?
hmm...i'm not too crazy. i'd say the stupidest crazy thing i've ever done was, in highschool, one of my best friends had a little 2 door cavalier and she'd drive up and down this street that all the high schoolers think it's cool to "cruise" and we'd hide in the trunk and when she stopped we'd pop out and freak the car behind us the F out. can i tell you how badly i want to go back to that time period and punch myself in the face? i could have died a horrible, crunchy death. oh, we were 150% sober, too. hihello, i used to be an idiot.

8. what movie can you watch over and over again?
honestly, i'm not a big movie fan. i'm almost never, ever in the mood to watch a movie. i do enjoy a little fight club now and then, though. i could probably stare at brad pitt and jared leto  watch that pretty frequently. or anything with steve carrell. he kills me.

9. who was your first concert?
kenny. chesney. hell, yes. have you seen his wrangler butt?

10. what is your idea of a perfect night?
depending on my mood i either like to be home alone, in bed with a hot cup of tea and a good book or hanging out with evan, at home, with tea, and a good show. (i kind of really don't like to leave my house. haha)

11. what weird quirk do you possess? 
ha. i'm the weirdest person ever. i can only use plastic utensils to eat yogurt and mac and cheese. i have to touch my silverware before i can use it. like the part that touches the food. i have to touch it first. before the food. when i buy a new purse, i imagine it in my car and if it'll look cute sitting on my seat while i'm driving. hahahaha i told evan that one the other night and he just shook his head. i'm a little bit of a craycray.

11 questions for you:

1. most embarrassing moment. go.
2. what's your favorite feature or your favorite thing about yourself?
3. if there was one thing you could make all of humanity start or stop doing, what would it be? (like, i'd make people start using their blinkers. don't you even say "love each other" because omg. i hate channing tatum.)
4. what are some of your favorite song lyrics?
5. what is one thing you cannot live without?
6. what's your biggest turn-off?
7. if you could do something crazy, just for a day (like get a tattoo, or dye your hair, or pierce your face), what would you do?
8. what's the weirdest thing on your bucket list?
9. what do you miss from your childhood? (naps. f'reals.)
10. what is your dream job? it doesn't even have to be a real "job." like, what do you wish you could get paid to do? (sleep, eat, throw temper tantrums in public...?)
11. what is something you would never EVER do?


thanks danielle for this funness. ya'll better do this and send me a link!

Wednesday, February 8, 2012

where i wish time had a pause button

that's my new dress. it's from anthropologie. it's not newnew, but it's pretty new. and it's still my favorite. i would wear it everyday if that was socially acceptable. it's also the first purchase i ever made from anthro and it was like 75% off. and two seconds after i bought it they were sold out. one of my life's proudest moments.

that's also a frozen river. we ventured out there as part of date 4 (which is still strewn about my living room....don't judge me.) and i went out on the ice, in my favorite dress and boots and stood there mid-freak out with my hands all awkwardly flipped out at my sides and my hair the size of snooki because of the wind and my runfall down the bank. it could have ended badly. but in that moment, i didn't even care. (till i got home and saw that picture of me and laughed out loud at how ridiculous i am sometimes. i need someone to walk around with me and tell me when i'm doing weird things like talking to myself or picking my nose [IT ITCHED.] or when my hair just became a person with a mind of its own and is now ten times bigger than it used to be or when my hands grow their own brain or when my purse is hiking my dress up and even though i have tights on they are still see-through and pretty soon you can see right through them or when my dress gets all staticy and looks like pants or when i have a piece of paper on my shoe that looks like TP....those are the times i need to hire someone to just handle my crap and make me look good.)

and do you know what? i really don't like winter. i hate being cold and shoveling the sidewalks and scraping my car and driving slow and navigating through the snow in my SUV that thinks it's a rollar skate and slush and dirty snow and ice and slow drivers and leaving for work extra early and not getting home till extra late and not having any daylight et cetera et cetera. but if winter wants to be a frozen river on a warm winded day off with my best friend who takes me to chinese buffet so i can stuff my face full of crab wontons and pork lo mein and drink my weight in hot tea and drive me around town looking for pieces for our date number four and then curl up with me in bed while we watch TV and drink more hot tea and take naps and hot showers and make excuses as to why we can't go to the gym and eat pitas because that's the only thing open at 10 pm and watch project runway and make fun of those ridiculous outfits and curl up in each others arms and fall fast asleep...........then winter, stay as long as you like.

Monday, February 6, 2012

five OR how i am not a one trick pony

disclaimer: we did not miss date four. date four is strewn about my living room. we'll get around to it. i told you, we're being flexible.

date five: thrifting.

can i possibly put into words how excited i was for this date? not possible. it was my turn to draw a date from the jar and when i pulled this one out, evan rolled his eyes at me.

can i possibly put into words how wrong evan was about this date?


we're doing some really fun art in our kitchen so we decided to hunt down some stuff for that. we got pretty distracted by the WALL of board games in the very first store we went to. the most expensive game? $4.99. And they were 25% off. I don't know if you've bought any sort of board games recently...but those suckers are expensive. we got five games for $12. FIVE. (actually three because evan got two sports games that I WILL NEVER PLAY, so they don't count.) but srsly. five games. for the most part, intact. we did have to steal a dice from another game, but dice smice. i'll steal dice all day long for games under five dolla.

that's my really awkward pose slash smile. and look how bad my hair is being! that awkward space?! ahhh! it totally read my last blog post and is now misbehaving even more. i didn't wash it last night (shhhhhh) and so it's being super punished today and is finally being

also, have you ever played "loaded questions?" so. much. fun. it was one of the games we found, but our friends also have this game and if you get a good group of people, who are funny, and obnoxious, you'll die of laughter. i'm the best at this game. i'm not even kidding you. if you want to really learn how to play, invite me over and i'll kick your butt.

next we decided to venture to another store for fun where we found some ugly paintings that we obviously decided to better.

i really, really like this picture of myself. just saying.

this is also being counted as another project for my home, so basically i've done 3 out of 12 (of the SAME THING hahaha), plus a couple little things here and there that i don't absolutely love, so i'm not going to put them on here. (you can't think i suck at anything, okay? because i don't.) sooooyep. that "Happiness" picture would have been a PERFECT match for our "home is wherever i'm with you" picture. pre-spray paint. they were probably by the same artist. sorry, artist. my art is better than yours.

we also used the rest of our letters from our earlier picture and didn't get more because we're cheap and lazy. i was making "e's" out of "f's" and "r's" out of "p's & b's & d's." following? that is talent. and that is also why the "h" is bigger. because it's masking tape and not letter sticker. and i wanted it bigger than the rest. that's what we call an "on purpose" mistake. it's also what you call "flexibility." (and that's also what is going on with the "r's" in "adventurers" below. which you didn't notice until i just now pointed that out. but they look like real "r's.")

 i saw that quote on pinterest and was like YES. YESYESY-E-S (direct quote). but we obviously made ours better than the pinterest one. obviously. and in case you can't read it, "oh darling, let's be adventurers." DO NOT ask me how many times i moved the "adventurers" over. so many. because the damn words is too long. and those stickers are too big! the paint peeled pretty bad because i was sticking and unsticking and sticking and unsticking the letters. mind you, i didn't realize i didn't have enough room until i was to, like, the last "s." every. single. time.

also funny is that this picture is boats on water. i am terrified of water (like the ocean kind, not the shower kind). because you can't see the bottom. i probably would never get on a cruise ship. omg i can't even imagine the kristen bell panic that would ensue. plus, they tip over. anyway, so this quote on this picture is quite hilarious. almost equally hilarious would be if it were on a picture of an airplane in the sky OVER the ocean. because ya'll know how much i love flying. put that scary, dark, bottomless ocean underneath that and i think i just peed my pants. terrifying. so evan, let's not be too adventurous adventurers. let's keep two feet on the solid ground. (kidding.)

and when i saw that asterisk on the sheet i squealed out loud and HAD TO use it. it's so cute. i would have put a million of them on there but evan held me down so i did not get to do that.

my OCD was in full force that night. the only reason i didn't have the hand-held level was because i couldn't find it. and i swear i'm not a one trick pony. next art project will be something entirely different yet just as amazing.

also, this was such a fun date. shopping + husband + wendy's frosties + trying to take a picture of a stranger + the crazy people that come out at thrift stores.

i love that man.

Wednesday, February 1, 2012

where i ramble a bit

today was the best day. i don't even know why. i was just so happy.

but i want to complain about something for a half a sec. two somethings, actually.

1. PICNIK IS CLOSING. why?! what is this "google+" will edit your photos crap? i don't get google+, it doesn't make any sense to me. the same way facebook's weekly design changes don't make any sense to me. i had a big fit about this when i first saw it but then they were all sweet and nice and like "we gave you all the premium features for free" and i was like SCORE! but then they took away half the crap. are you like closing down an actual store, picnik? where you have to slowly get rid of things before your lease is up? no. you're not. so put all that crap back up, don't shut down, and let me continue to edit my pictures for free.

2. PICASA IS CREEPY. the other day blogger was like "your photo stash is full" or something. so it gave me a link to GO BUY MORE STORAGE (which i think it meant it wants to pay me to write here?.......soo.....yep.) and when i did that, i wasn't actually going to buy more storage because if i can't have like 300 photos on here, then buhbye. no. do you want to know why my storage is full? because RANDOM pictures THAT I NEVER, EVER, EVER put on blogger or the internet or anywhere but on my computer ARE ON PICASA. this ridiculous picture of me making a fish face. on there. 75 pictures of me trying to get a good outfit picture. on there. and even creepier than that is all these pictures have like 700 views. WHAT THE HECKFIRE?! (that's what people in the south say and i really want to be from the south so i say that, too.) (no, i really say that though. ask evan.) you know how you find ridiculous youtube videos where people are just making fools out of themselves? so you watch it. then your friends come over and you're all, "have you seen 'hitmanbreakeroftheeye?'" "No." "OMGWATCHTHIS." and then more friends come over and more friends and more friends and you all show them and then they go out and show their friends and pretty much i just created an internet phenom. (also, you're welcome for that link.) and so, i have 700 views on some random picture of myself that i don't even remember taking. and i'm not even exaggerating. i've never looked at this photo so i don't know who is. and why there are 700 views on it? so am i like some internet phenom between a random group of people who are like, "dude. look at this ridiculous girl. she takes the dumbest pictures of herself."

i'm so stressed out over this!

and then, THEN, i went to delete all of these awkward pictures of myself, because obviously, and do you know what a chore that is? it's like picasa purposely creeps on your computer for the most ridiculous pictures of yourself and then has the most asinine deletion process. it took like 30 minutes to delete like 4 pictures. those are not good odds for me getting rid of these weird pictures of myself.


but in good news, i got a cute dress from target!

the top is my favorite. geometric squares? okay! i know my hair is a little scary. i got stuck in a wind storm or something. right after i posted about how this is my favorite haircut, my hair read that and decided it would turn into a naughty 3-year-old child. i put it in a timeout messy bun and it still won't behave. also, that's my work bathroom. we didn't have a bathroom on our floor for over a month. and they didn't even tell anyone they were renovating it. i walked in there one day to no floor, walls or ceiling. just a big black hole. i really love communicating about necessities like BATHROOMS that are no longer there. but whatever. POINT IS: my dress is cute.