here's how you play: acquire a sick that requires you to cough NO LESS than 35 times a minute. and it has to be the sickest kind of cough you can muster. the kind where you cough all the air out of your lungs; don't cough those little wussy baby coughs like something went down the wrong tube. make it count. if you have a nice, wet cough, even better.
walk around coughing your eyes out of your head and don't cover your mouth. don't wash your hands. don't lysol anything. (one time, HR sent out an email reminding people to wash their hands after going potty. in case you are confused i don't work in a daycare. that was real life.) keep coughing until your lungs are bruised and inflamed and your esophagus is as dry as a rock. one point for every person who gets your sick!
i'm not even kidding. this is a for reals game we play. this hacking cough has gone from one end of the office to the other, climbed the stairs to the 5th floor and came back down. it jumped over me and then it came back and missed me again. i swear if i get this, i will personally hold these people down and spray lysol up their noses until their lungs are clean of this vile disease.
2. hair.
i'm having an on again off again love affair with my hair. this is the longest it has ever been and i can't decide if i want to keep it or donate it. to the trash can. i want to keep it long because i want so badly to be good at doing my hair. but let's be real. i'm just not. i'm really good at getting it stuck in everything, and evan's really good at laying on it and ripping it out of my head......so......i just don't know. and short hair. how short? like pixie? shoulder length? chin length? a-line? asymmetrical? TOO MANY OPTIONS. can we pause for a moment and think about how obnoxious it is to grow out your hair?! omg. suck. and? i have this stupid little hair flip cow lick thing in the back that WILL. NOT. STOP. unless my hair is this long.
then and now. long verse short. 21 verse 23.
i don't know what to do. if my hair would just behave on a regular basis, i wouldn't have to threaten to cut it off. and would my new bangs look good with a bob? oh mah gosh. FIRST WORLD PROBLEMS.
amiright?
3. something that makes me want to push you.
when i have really exciting news and you give me your two cents that is basically bashing my really exciting news and if you are a member of my family and you are not being nice and or kind and or supportive, then shut your hole. i hate nothing more than bossy people. especially those bossy people who have no idea why you do the things you do because it is their way or it's wrong and there is no convincing them otherwise. because obviously, someone who is 19 and in their first year of college knows a hell of a lot more than i do about my own life. obviouslyyyy.
Your hair is pretty long! I'm growing mine out for the wedding & I hate it every day of my life. But once it started growing out everyone started telling me how much better I look with longer hair. & I'm just like okay, were you staying at me for the 12 months that I had short hair & vomiting a little in your mouth?
ReplyDeleteAN OFFICE IS A GIANT CESSPOOL OF INFECTION!
BAHAHAHA! Oh my gosh! Pass the stick! Soooo funny! I got the bad cold last week, but I'm all betters..Just pump up on the Vitamin C girl and it shall pass you again, Lordwilling! Why won't people cover their mouths when they cough???? Bad people.... And about your hair.. I'm gonna say try to get it as long as possible until you're about to go nuts and then give it a little trim...I love long hair..and you look great with it...
ReplyDeleteJanette the Jongleur
DUDE I hate number three. Nothing worse than a know it all/debbie downer. That person needs to stfuuuu.
ReplyDeleteAnd I'm gonna be honest, I usually don't like it when girls cut their hair really short BUTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT You seriously rock it! I loveeee it in that picture! Of course you look beautiful either way, long distance bff :)
I think we should all agree to never play that game again. For real.
ReplyDeleteI think your hair looks awesome both ways! I'm super lame with my hair too. It's either straight or curly. I don't do much to it. But I refuse to cut it because my curly doo is way shorter than the straight do. If I cut it short then my curly do becomes a mini fro. And we can't have that. 1st world problems indeed.
Oh and I would push them too. Rage! Haha!
@courtney- I know! Offices are so gross. With our 200+ people we tend to create new diseases. I just can't handle how rude and idiotic these GROWN UPS are! Also, hair growing sucks! Mine grew like 1 inch in 12 months then once my wedding hit bambambam all of the sudden it showed up. Stupid. So......good luck! Also no. Your hair is adorable short and I bet it looks great long! No one threw up in their mouthes bahahaha
ReplyDelete@janette- they are all bad people. Should I say that to them as they cough all over? Yes, probably. Baha also thank you! I think I like it better long, and I might as well keep it this way for as long as possible.
@katie-well thanks! If you saw it on most days you would not say that. It was kind of scary. My hair is usually pretty scary. Hahaha and yes! People need to shut. The FFFFF. Up! Naow! I slapped them in my mind and that made it better until I can actually slap them IRL.
@amy-hahaha mini fro! Please do it? Your hair is so curly and mine is like half curly half wavy which is even worse. Hair is annoying. Let's all be bald.
@amy- not that your hair is bad! Sometimes I can't use words. Hahaha I think your hair is beautiful straight or curly! =]
ReplyDeleteUgh. I am always trying to grow out my hair, and then I cut it. Last year, I went boy short and it is just to the point where I can do something with it, but that takes a lot of time. Ponytail anyone?
ReplyDelete..rachael
lightasafeatherblog.blogspot.com
@rachel-ug. I know. That's how I was until I had to grow it out for my wedding and every. Single. Day. It went up in a pony! Growing it out sucks because it stays awkward for so dang long! I've always wanted to go short short short! Maybe someday!
ReplyDeleteUmm...yeah we have an office sickness, too. So far this prego lady has been able to dodge it all, but I don't know how much longer my skin can handle constant Germ-X and lysol wipes! ....Also, the hair thing...I'm at that point too. I loved my short hair, but I really want long hair that I can do something with. But my hair sucks long because I have thin hair that just lays flat. Agreed....First world problem!
ReplyDelete@dani-but your hair is so cute! You're babe is gonna want to grab all that hair in his teeny tiny fists. So....and good for not getting sick! Must be our genes? Haha and I agree about the germ-x. So gross. Pour skin. =[
ReplyDeleteLoved this post. Your humor kills me.
ReplyDeleteI love your long hair!
@danielle- my goal is to kill you every time you read my blog. Just kidding! =] haha thank you!!! I like it, too, and so it's staying for now. We'll see how I feel tomorrow...
ReplyDeletehi! i just found your blog and so glad i did! this is such an amazing post and i loveee your photos! you just gained yourself a new follower! keep up the great work! If you have the time, we would appreciate it if you could check out our blog!
ReplyDeletei love your long hair!
xoxo
http://thegreenraybans.blogspot.com
We totally played that game at work. Except it was just one person who was "it" and we all tried not to get the disease. But she was really good at it. She coughed on the water cooler, my computer, and basically the entire back kitchen. I caught it just in time for Denver... sooo much fun.
ReplyDeleteHahaha cam you crack me up. NOT IT! Hahaha hold her down and Lysol her face off. Rude people. She deserves Lysol in the lungs since she made you sick for your vacay.
ReplyDeleteYour hair is looking awesome. I love long hair but oh how I want a pixie some day. SOME DAY ill have one.
ReplyDeleteAndddd amen on the someone putting in their negative two cents to your exciting news.I HATE THAT! I just wanna scream, "Really?!! You cant be excited for me for 2 seconds!!!!!!"
ugh.
@amber-I knowww! I want a pixie but I can imagine I'd look like such a fool. This girl I work with has one and looks like a boy. Cannot. Handle. Also I knowww?! Why isn't it legal to Light people on fire? Jk. That's extreme but sometimes.....
ReplyDelete