so this is love.

"it's when you love somebody so much that no matter what happens that'll never change.  like even if you're gone.  it's still the same.  even if you die.  you die, but not the love.  not forever love."

memories

+you know how i could never talk to you? so you let me play mah jong while i broke up with you.

+it was spirit week, more specifically cowboy day. i almost took the blades off my ice skates because i thought they'd look like cowboy boots.

+i remember our first kiss, during dick & jane. we watched every deleted scene, every blooper, every extended extra, and let that opening scene on the dvd play over and over and over again. just so i didn't have to leave.

+i was two seconds away from pouring ketchup all over myself and the carpet, and pretending to be dead. but then you came out of the bathroom, so i didn't.

+we forgot to put our house keys back in our backpacks so we checked every window, every door, and had to wait until dad got home to get in the house. in the mean time, we laid in the grass between the our house and mema's, and took naps.

+the unspoken rule of "whoever asks if we can watch tv gets to control the remote."

+those lights in the livingroom, with that metal ring. you're suppose to pour the perfume on the ring and not on the hot lightbulb, and it's not suppose to shatter all over you.

+i remember exactly what i was wearing when i met you: khaki shorts, a blue aero shirt, an orange tank top, and some sort of flip flops. i don't know why i would remember that, i didn't even talk to you, or look at you.

23 before 24 update

Number 11: Start the process of buying a home.

hahaha betcha didn't think i'd cross this off my list so fast, did ya?! well guess what we did last night? made an offer on our first home. <3 <3 <3

it's sort of a long story. and it sort of just happened. remember back when i was complaining about my shower being broken? a legit complaint because a shower is a necessity of my life, hello.  well, there was this adorable house down the street from us on the way to my parents' house. every time we'd drive by we'd say, "there's our house!" we didn't know what the inside looked like, but it was so stinkin cute from the outside. (let me tell you. curb appeal is SOOOO important.) one day we grabbed a flyer and about died of shock from the price. it was cheap cheap. except evan and i had no idea how much 888 square feet is but apparently not very much.

anyway. it was just a dream. we were like, maybe by Christmas we'll have saved up enough money to start looking. then the shower got worse. so we told my parents about the house, on a whim, and they tried to find it one sunday during open house time.  they didn't find that house, but they found another, so the marched over to my house, picked me up, took me back. the realtor was a titch rude, like "oh you're a first time homebuyer? ohhhh. mmhmm. kbai." as if i can't afford a nice home because hi. i can.

that house did me in. i needed to see more. it was like crack. so my mom and i spent all night looking at houses online and finding a million for me to show evan. we found one we loved...remember this picture:

 it's two blocks from where we live now. we love love love our neighborhood because it's pretty much where we both grew up. we love the schools, all the parks, most of the people.....but we fell in love with this house. except, it was the first house evan saw. it was the first house we saw together.  and it was expensiveeeee.

we went through a million different fights on this house. from price, to her taking it off the market and letting these children move in who i see smoking 2 inches from the front door which if you ask anyone who is allergic to cigarettes, they'll tell you that's basically indoors. and they have parties there every night, with people who leave their trash in the yard. and i am going to spend that much money and have to clean up after these dumb boys?

uh no.

so last week, our realtor told me someone put an offer in the house. very much above what he told us the seller would be willing to take. which meant our offer would be puny in comparison, and we would lose the game. we were both pretty upset. we love love love this house. the adorable loft, which we were going to turn into a chic wood cabin-y master. the two fire places. the 1950's kitchen with its metal cabinets. the gorgeous crown molding in all the rooms. the privacy stone fence and the massive garage. the things we loved trumped 150% the things we didn't. 

and then we didn't get it. part was our fault for waiting so long to put an offer in. but even with the highest offer we would have put in, our mortgage would have been on the high end of what we were comfortable paying and we would have stretched ourselves thin, never left the house, and ate dirt. 

obviously someone's watchin over us. =]

so our realtor forced us to continue to look even though every other house paled in comparison. like the one with cat poop in the floor of the closet. (that happened.) or the one with cracks in the wall and 1-2 inches of space between each board on the floor. and the dirt in the living room where they ripped out the fireplace. or the one with the matching wallpaper and bedspread.

but then we found one.

it is the perfect little first time home buyer home. a family of four lives in it now, and i'm sure it was their first home, too. we put an offer in last night, and now we're just waiting to hear back. i am so anxious i could pee my pants. 

but we started this process. we took a huge, gigantic step into this process that is not as hard as it sounds. and also, evan has been amaaaaazing through everything. because 1. i am picky. 2. i am picky. 3. i am picky and a child sometimes. and he put up with it all. <3

week of thanks, week thirty seven

344. Going for a run. And little baby Snap's running legs.

345. New boots!!! Since the lining ripped in my other ones, and it was an epic event to get them off without taking my entire foot with them...it was time for some new ones. From a cousin who works at a shoe store and gets me a great discount.

346. Five free pairs of glasses coming in the mail! So I can finally see again.  Well, soon. Once I get the actual prescription ones, that is.

347. When you can't judge a week by its Monday.

348. Not getting shot or stabbed at comedy hour. That was one of the most terrifying moments of my life. But I had a big bad husband next to me. So that, too.  Husbands who protect.

349. Being allowed to do more things at work. And not being the "new girl" anymore. 

350. Oh.....putting an offer in on a home.

351. Taking the bedding out of the dryer, wrapping up in it, and immediately falling asleep. I don't care how hot it is. This is the best feeling ever.

352. Fall TV! Did anyone else watch Grey's and want to punch Derrek and Meredith in the face? Ps. Zola is SO cute. I want.

353. Count down to Ethiopia turning into weeks, not months!

so this is love.

"This is love, I think.  A pace where people who have been alone may lock together like hawks and spin in the air, dizzy with surprise at the connection.  A place you go willingly, and with wonder."

hand in hand with you, i would travel anywhere. i would live under a bridge, in a hut, in a cave. i would eat chicken hearts and balut and injera. give me forever, and you can take all of me, forever and ever and ever.

this week is already pissing me off.

i'm doing this insane crazy thing at work where i have to go through a million and 6 pages of medical records to see if they match up with junk we already have that i've already gone through 403 times. i have it memorized and i don't want to remember any of it.

evan found the very very very last pair of missoni flats at target in my size. but how come the stupid part that covers your toes is like .0005 inches long? my toes aren't that long, but i had major toe cleavage, and although i can stand a bit of toe cleavage, this was like stuffing a size f into a size aa bra. too much.

we were thisclose to the most amazing thing ever ever and then my idiot landlord kind of ruined my life. i'm super peeved. also, why are all the cute, affordable, darling houses like 65 miles out of the way? i don't want to live 100 light years away from my friends and family. evan is being a super duper rock during this whole obnoxious process and i'm super duper thankful for him. because i've already given up, sat down with my face in the corner, and banged my head repeatedly. until he picked me up and made me keep going. moral: i'm a wuss. evan is awesome.

i really hate being that girl who complains all the time. which is what i feel that i am. so i'm going to give myself that today, since today was lame. but tomorrow will be amazing. so will dinner with friends on wednesday because i'm making cheesecake obviously. and it's comedy weekend. this week WILL look up. i can see that sunshine right behind those clouds!

Week of Thanks, Week Thirty Six

336. Finding the notes I made in my phone to evan during my tonsil recovery when i couldn't talk (jamie's idea) and peeing my pants. "Yes, Quizno's with their toasted crunchy bread that will rip my throat open. No, dingdong."
"I'm gonna shower in case they do want to hang out. Cuz my pitties are growing new bacteria. So baiii." (omg.)
"do you want to know something about yourself? clearly i'm doing something so hold on a damn minute. something: if there is something, anything on the floor you will step on it."
"want to know something about me? something: this medicine heightened my sense of annoyances so that noise you're making with that disgusting drink? i'm going to give you tonsil scabs with that straw if you don't stop it."
"Get a different alarm. that's pissing me off. i don't care. it's 6 why are you waking up at 6? it woke me up and i was sleeping fine. well then get up and turn it off." 
"you're being violent and i cannot swallow so i have a ton of spit built up and i'll spit on you (true story.). do not tempt me. chocolate." (hahahahahha)
no, really. that's how i act in real life.

337. Seeing my husband 3 times in one work day. Breakfast, lunch, afternoon snack. i love him.

338. Dyson vacuum cleaners. there is something so, so satisfying about emptying a canister and seeing all that nasty stuff you've been walking around on and sitting on and laying on (yuuuuum) go in the trash.

339. Crafting nights with Jamie. Our wreaths are amazing. Craft night needs to be a new tradition.

340. Have you ever seen someone drive like an idiot and want to follow them and yell at their face/leave a note? i do. all. the. time. but there are too many people to follow! how do you choose? well. on thursday, jamie and i saw this idiot run this red light. bad. plus they were driving like a crazy anyway. they deserved two notes. guess what? idiot is my new neighbor! i left a note!!! oh, happy day!

341. Twenty seven days till eithiopia which means that's 16 days until November which means November is less than 45 days which means we can put an offer in on our house!!!

342. "That jealousy that you're feeling right now? That's how you purposely make larissa feel every chance you can. enjoy it." IF ONLY he would have actually said that out loud. made my life.

343. Days when you don't need an alarm clock.

thankful for the rainy weekend

there are good things in store for today. good things that make up for the weirdest week of my life.


/like when that crazy girl at work got allllll sorts of pissed off about me getting 45 pieces of paper stuck in the copier. (to which she said, "i hate people." yeah, i just hate when people get paper stuck inside the copier, and the copier is just the victim. what?!)

/or when i had the crappiest couple of days. just because. sometimes you just have multiple bad days, you know?

/when i was kinda maybe hung over on wednesday. too. much. wine. and then we forgot about the bottle in our freezer and it exploded. that was fun, too.

/feeling defeated.



but today:

/i'm going to evan's first lgf game (he's a coach, i'm not married to a 12-year-old. that would be weird).

/i'm going to finish my wreath while evan spends his day doing gross football stuff.

/i have an ethiopia meeting to which i just learned i get to leave a day early! at 1! yaaay! (also, the entire team is leaving at different times. my mom is leaving at 5. some people are still leaving on saturday. night.mare.) (and when i found that out, i just sat at my desk and laughed because i was so excited. good thing no one walked by. i'm a freak sometimes.)

/symphony tonight. and our tickets were bogo! and we get to dress up!

/it's rainy. it's cloudy. boots, scarves, jackets, and hot hot hot tea. today is already perfect.

hey! soldier!

if you have a significant other, you probably know that some of the funniest stories they tell are of your sleeping habits. evan can make the tears roll down my face with his descriptions of how i am in my sleep.


but.


you should hear my stories about him.


like last night, when he reached over me, started shaking me and said, "Hey! Soldier!!!" hahaha (all whilst sleeping.)

and then the following conversation:
me: "what?" (awake.)
evan: "do you know that little yellow house, it's really small, but this really old guy has taken really good care of it? we looked at it today. i think it's on beverly hills?" (asleep.)
me: "the one to the west? what about it?"
evan: "i want to tell that old man thank you."(still sleeping.)

he was dreaming about "the hunger games," and where this random yellow house came in i just do not know. and later he told me he didn't know if i was a boy or a girl which is why he woke me up with "hey! soldier!"


or the time i woke up to him petting the bed. he was standing over his side of the bed just petting it with his hand. "evan. evan. EVAN! what are you doing?!" "getting the water off." "get in bed. get in bed. EVAN. GET. IN. THE. BED. NOW."


or when we were planning on dinner with our friends jess and joe. i woke up to evan sitting up in bed, and when i asked him what he was doing, he replied, "getting out of the way so joe can cook the chicken."


there's been highfives, and attempted helicopter landings ("SIX FEET AT TWELVE O'CLOCK!"), sleep walking around the house, kicks, punches, hair pullings....



we get pretty crazy round these parts.

Week of Thanks, Week Thirty Five

327. Family discounts at shoe stores.

328. Holidays off. And sleeping in.

329. Evan's birthday. <3

330. House hunting.

331. Long game nights spent with friends.

332. Spending entire days with the husband. Pointing left. Shoe shopping. House hunting. Honking horns.

333. Evan's sleep talking shenanigans. Blog to follow.

334. Puppies who eat anything off the floor. Example:

335. Husbands who stop the meltdowns. Because sometimes meltdowns just happen. And Evan is very best ever, ever at making me feel better. And knowing exactly what to say to make everything better. <3

Week of Thanks, Week Thirty Four

319. When people can give you constructive criticism and not really criticize.

320. Husbands who clean the entire house in an hour to surprise me after work. And then leave me a little love note. <3 EPC gets the gold medal in husbandness.

321. Last day of August. Finally.

322. Paying for Ethiopia. With help from the most generous people I've ever heard of. God provides.

323. Matthew 6:25-33.

324. Brand new kindle. Sometimes, Amazon just really is the most amazing company in the world.

325. Finding a beer I like love. Shock Top Raspberry Wheat. I hate beer, but most especially wheat beer. And this? YUM.

326. This:

Eeee!!! <3

some pretty pictures for your saturday night

i found these growing against a brick wall near my house. i sort of fell in love. which is good because it's another thing to add to my ever growing list of "why-that-house-is-so-perfect-for-us." Reason #105: It's brick. Mental note to plant these lovelies when we move in.

23 before 24 update

Number 17 part 3: Take a picture of the same place once a month for a year.

(One, Two)

Are you depressed there's only 3 pictures? I am. Because of this nonsense:

Let me teach you something: Montana has "four" seasons. And by "four," we mean 11 months of winter, a week of spring, a week of fall, and 3 weeks of 100 degree days. Winter began yesterday because apparently when we started September it automatically needed to be 60 degrees. I wore my North Face. My winter coat. In September. And I know I'm cheating by posting these September two, but I took these August 31. Swear. Which is basically September in the rule book of "Don't start road construction three days before it snows." Which they did. And also in my area of picture taking. Double annoyed.

Montana has clearly reached fall. I saw a yellowing tree tonight and I got a little sad. And look at that grass!!! Yellow. Fall. However, I love fall. I'm not ready for snow. I'm ready for scarves and mittens and boots and jackets and apple cider and when you can see your breath. Just not that gross snow that comes after it.