Things Maddox Says v.1

Some of my favorite blog posts ever are from moms with hilarious kids. I don't know, maybe it's like how as a parent you think your child is the cutest child in all the world, even if he or she is most definitely not. Except for that Maddox is and also he's the funniest. We are the luckiest parents. So, I wanted to start posting the things he says here for safe keeping. When he turns three I'm going to do something really fun with all of the funnies he's said this year. Also, we came home from Guatemala and he was basically speaking in full sentences and we made a promise to never leave again. Here are just a few things Maddox has said over the past few months that have made us laugh:

"Do you want to count to ten?"-Evan
"Yeah."-Maddox
"One..."-Evan
"Babies. Off."-Maddox

"Maddox, isn't it so nice outside?"-me
"Windy? Nope."-Maddox 

"Butt. Wet. Nice."-Maddox 

"Close your eyes."-me
"Eyes up."-Maddox 

"Did you go to church last night?"-me
"Yeah."-Maddox
"Did you learn about Jesus?"-
"Jesus. love. me."-Maddox 

"Buf-uh-you"-Maddox 

(that's what he calls a buffalo and no one's allowed to correct him because it's SO cute.)

"Maddox, what's a buffalo?"-me
"Ummmm. Bless you. Bless you, mama."-Maddox 

"What did you dream about?"-me
"Ummm. Beans."-Maddox 

"Maddox, what's in your pocket?"-me
"Poop."-Maddox 

"Maddox, should we got sit on the potty and try to go pee?"-me
"No, I peed right there."-Maddox 

"I love pickles."-Maddox 

"Can you teach me how to count to ten?"-me

"One, two, eight, NINE!!!"-Maddox

for the love of five

Evan and I snuck out of town this past weekend to celebrate five whole years together with a day or two of uninterrupted US time. We planned this trip before Guatemala because I made an appointment at a spa thanks to some unused giftcards and begged Evan to come with me and he agreed as long as I didn't make him do anything weird. (Run-on sentence for lyfe.)

Side bar: When I made the appointment, I told the guy (perfect, yes) that my husband is not a spa guy and I needed to sign us up for something man-friendly, what did he suggest. What did he suggest? A sugar body scrub or a body wrap. Yes, amen to that. I'll take two.

I am a Good Wife and so although it would have been comical to surprise Evan with a sugar body scrub, I declined that offer and instead got us a couple's facial and a couple's massage. Evan was still weirded out by everything. "Why are you naked under your robe?" "Complete comfort. You wear a bra for one day and report back to me." "Are there blankets on the bed?" "Are you supposed to wear the sandals?" Etc, etc. I'm clearly a Spa Veteran Princess and forgot that there are people here who don't frequent the spa enough to know what the heck is going on.

But I digress. I was completely ready for this spa date because on Thursday as I was trying to run errands and pick up a few final things before our trip, Maddox projectile vomited on me in the middle of Old Navy. He didn't eat breakfast (refused, first clue, idiot mom) and so it was all liquid and I was mortified and wanted to die right then and there. So yeah. Take me to the spa and don't come back, please and thanks.

I was pretty worried about leaving that sweet pea because what mama wants to leave her sickly child for two days while she's off gallivanting in the woods and having strangers rub lotion into her body parts? Well, I didn't but I thought about it for at least a minute.

It was only a single night away but it was just what we needed to refresh and unplug and celebrate. We had our spa date and then we went to dinner and I ate bison potstickers which is a Big Deal because buffalo disgust me but my gf Erin told me they were the best and so I let Evan have this one thing and they actually were good. So. She didn't lie to me and maybe buffalo isn't the most disgusting after all. The jury is still out on that one but there might be hope yet. We brought along our traditional anniversary cake and it was (and still is because it is SO. MUCH. CAKE.) delish. On Saturday we didn't set any alarms and woke up super late because we can and let's be real: because a tiny dictator wasn't there to boss us around. We had coffee and breakfast and drove up the mountain to do a little hiking and ended up doing a little hiking in the rain. I also bought cowboy boots for my gf Erin's wedding this August. I am so jacked about them because they're adorable and I live in Montana and so it's a requirement to be a citizen and I just now at 27 got my first pair (my first pair were actually white with sparkles and fringe but those have been long gone, sadly.) and I'm in love. Obviously I wore them to dinner and obviously I will probably wear them every day for the rest of forever because I love.

It was so good to get home to our little love even if it was only for one day. I'm a strong proponent of dating even if you're married. Like, just do it. Spend the money on a babysitter if you don't have grandparents (or friends who offer on the daily?) and get out there and enjoy each other. Maybe get yourselves a sugar scrub at a spa or save the money on that and mix up your own little sugar scrub and do it at home. That's romantic and cute and probably messy but mostly fun.

Five

Dear Husband,

Anniversaries are boring. One whole day out of the year people celebrate their marriage like this one day matters more than the other three hundred whatever. That every single morning, sans one day, married people wake up and go about their business as if there's only one single day in the whole year that makes a marriage count. We fall into that trap as well. We get a babysitter and we make a reservation at a fancy restaurant. I dress up and spend more than 10-minutes curling my hair. I even wear lipstick and dig into the depths of my makeup drawer for the cracked and broken eyeshadows that I only wear once a year. I buy a new dress and maybe even new shoes and I'll surprise you with them seconds before we head out the door. And that's it. Sure, on our first anniversary we went to the mountains and stayed at a resort and had the best meal of our life and had too much wine because everyone we knew sent us on our way with a bottle of wine, plus the three that I had bought because I clearly thought that not one or two would be enough.

But that's it.

We put so much expectancy on the date that we got married that we forget about the in-betweens. The other three hundred whatever days of the year that aren't the special days. The days where I don't get out of my pajamas until it's 10 pm and I'm only getting out of them to put a clean pair on. The days where we fight and I don't speak a single word to you. The days where I have no motivation to do anything and so Maddox and I sit around until you come home and rescue us from the funk we've put ourselves in. Those are the days that I'm talking about. The ones that aren't boring because they're real life. Those are the days where the fights happen and the baby screams himself to sleep for approximately thirty minutes and the dinner didn't turn out like I had planned and I've ran the same load of laundry through the washer at least eight times because I don't want to put the crap from the dryer away.

But you, my sweet husband, you've taken those three hundred whatever days and scooped them up like candy and presented them to me to prove that anniversaries are boring. It is a boring life to live for one whole day out of the whole year. It is a boring life to buy a new dress that I'll never wear again and to eat at a stuffy restaurant where we don't belong, just because we made it another year. Success in our next year of marriage does not hinge on how we spend July 10th, this I promise you.

And this is what you've promised me because you have given me the opposite of a boring life. You have made this marriage count not just on the day we were wed, but on the other days too. I do put weight on this day because it is the day that I married my best friend. I wore a pretty dress and had my hair done and didn't see you until I came around the corner on my dad's arm and there you were at the top of those stairs and I was like, "Yes. This is it." And so I love today. I love that today marks the beginning of our life together and we can look at this day and remember why it is that we said, "I do," six, twenty, thirty-nine-years down the road. But I am so glad that you have chosen to make our marriage work the rest of the days, too. I'm glad that the rest of the days matter more than that one day. That you surprise me with days off of work and a coffee every Friday morning after your meeting with your students (it's still a surprise, okay? don't stop.) and desire for our marriage to be as much of an example of what God intended marriage to be as I do.

Let's continue to have boring anniversaries. Even if we find ourselves hiking across Europe or sticking our toes in the Caribbean. Even if we live in Africa one day or across the country from our parents and refuse to pay for a babysitter, let's keep them boring. Let's make the days in between all of the years matter more.

Happy five-years. I love you.
L